What you allow is what will continue!

What you allow is what will continue!

Breaking the Cycle: Understanding What You Allow in Family Dynamics

As someone who has navigated the complexities of family dynamics, I understand the profound truth behind the saying, "What you allow is what will continue." Often, addressing personal feelings and concerns within family circles can be daunting, especially when met with denial or dismissal.

Through personal experience, I've learned that speaking up about my feelings within my family seemed to exacerbate the situation, leading to labels and misunderstandings.

Navigating Feelings within Family Dynamics:

Fear of Speaking Up

In my own journey, I've faced the fear of expressing my emotions within my family. There was a fear that discussing feelings would only lead to further conflict or being labeled as the instigator of drama.


Pattern of Denial and Invalidation

Sadly, many families tend to deny or dismiss feelings, leading to an invalidation of emotions. This dismissal often reinforces a pattern where personal emotions are not given the space or importance they deserve.


Being Labeled the Problem

Often, when attempting to open up about feelings, the dynamic shifted, and I was labeled as the one causing disruption or labeled as the "drama queen." This further discouraged open communication.


Understanding the Impact:

Acknowledging these experiences highlights the crucial concept that allowing these patterns to persist within the family structure only perpetuates the cycle of misunderstandings and emotional suppression. What is permitted to continue unchecked within family interactions often shapes future interactions and relationships.

Breaking the Cycle: Empowering Change

Setting Boundaries

 Establishing clear boundaries about what is acceptable in terms of communication within the family circle is essential. This includes fostering an environment where everyone's feelings are respected and validated.


Seeking External Support

Sometimes, seeking support from a professional, such as a therapist or counselor, can provide a safe space to navigate these feelings without the fear of being labeled or dismissed.


Effective Communication Strategies

Employing effective communication strategies can aid in expressing feelings without leading to conflict or denial. This involves using "I" statements and active listening to foster understanding.




As a sibling who has faced these challenges firsthand, I understand the complexities of addressing feelings within the family context. However, allowing the perpetuation of dismissive or invalidating behavior only reinforces a cycle of emotional suppression.

By setting boundaries, seeking external support, and employing effective communication strategies, we can strive to break this cycle and create an environment where feelings are acknowledged, respected, and valued within the family dynamic.

Remember, what you allow is indeed what will continue, but change begins with empowering oneself to speak up and seek understanding.

READ MORE: 

Expert Tips for Parents Dealing with Difficult Teenagers

6 Steps to Nurturing Happy and Resilient Kids

The Dangers of Parental Favoritism in Families

Parenting Challenges in 2023 - A Short Guide for Concerned Parents

 

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